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ASSTASTIC ASIANS 3

TITLE: ASSTASTIC ASIANS 3
STUDIO: Outrageous
CAST: Lilly Thai, Kat, Annie Cruz, Katsumi, Charmane Star


Well here it is my first porn film reviewed here! Enjoy:

This gonzo film has no plot, just this idea: a lucky, white guy fucks a hot Asian girl. Nothing more nothing less. The female cast is amazing, though.

First off, we get cover girl, and all around goddess and my first official Hot Asian Girl of the Month, Lilly Thai. Her scene is the most smoldering of the batch. I fucking love this girl!

The second scene is the weakest. Though, Kat is a total cutie, seeing her strap-on and fuck a dude's butt is NOT my thing, but the hot facial at the end makes up for it, well almost. Just hit the FF button!

Next we have the lovely Annie Cruz. Love the way this scene starts off. And, she has a very exotic look to her that I just love.

Then cums, Katsumi, who is a personal fav of mine. While every scenes ends with a nice facial, her's is the best. Fucking awesome! Get the tissues ready!!!!!!!

Finally, the last scene is the gorgeous Charmane Star. My God, this girl is stunning. It starts off smoldering and then ends boiling hot.

The DVD is said to be "limited edition", uhm, why? Cause it has a slipcase? What the hell is so limited about that? Also, the back promises a threesome, there ain't one. Instead, Kat (who is mentioned on the cover) is not featured on the back. Why? Who the fuck knows! There are no extras or even a title sequence. Nonetheless, the picture quality is really nice.

That all said and done this is nice fucking choice for those us with Asian Fever. Plus, it is really fucking cheap. I scored it for like 6 bucks. And, it is certainly worth more than that!

THREE AND HALF Woodies out of FOUR

Josie Maran



Friday night I decided to pop in my DVD of Gravedancers and I was reminded of the hotness of Josie Maran.

I been a long time fan the 29 year old (she was born May 8, 1978) model/ actress . She is of Russian, Polish, German, French, and Dutch (wow! That’s a lot right there!) mix. While, I have no clue why she dated David Blaine, in the first place, at least she ain’t with him no longer. That said she has a kid with some photographer guy named Ali Alborzi, which makes her a MILF!

Anyways, I was really happy when I saw her on the cover of an issue of Maxim . That was to promote Van Helsing. Said movie is far from good, but I have seen worse. The horrible acting by the guy who played Dracula, ridiculous plot, and shitty CGI overdose really hamper this fucker. Universal and classic horror fans, in general, may wanna avoid this one. Still, Moran plays one of Drac’s three brides. And, while there are three other hotties in the film, including Underworld’s Kate Bekinsale, Moran, is in my humble opinion, the hottest babe in the film. She dies at the beginning, but truthfully, she can suck my blood any time she wants, too!

Getting back to Gravedancers , this fun, but flawed film is directed by Mike Mendez, who also made the kick-ass killer nun-demon film, The Convent, and it tells the tale of three friends (Moran being one of them) who dance on graves on a drunken night and now have to contend with some really pissed off ghosts. The acting is strong and along with Clare Kramer (she played Glory on Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and Meghan Perry, Moran is accompanied by two ravishing females. I really liked this film, but the climax is too over-the-top and hurts the film. Still, you should see this one.

For those of you into reality TV should note that she was also in Dancing with the Stars, but was voted off after one appearance. Fools! She would never get voted off my show! Even if her dancing did suck!

And so, with her long legs, sexy body, beautiful face, lovely light brown colored eyes, this stunner is just a complete and utter heartbreaker!

Movies That Changed My Life

- While, Empire Strikes Back is clearly the best of the series, and the single film i have watched the most amount of times, Return blew me away as a child. I became obsesses with it and could not stop thinking or talking about it. My memories of seeing in the theatres, as a child, are still a part of me.


- before seeing this, black and white films, in my head, were all bloodless, but this masterpiece changed everything. it impacted me. now imagine how it most have impacted people back then. Along with Hammer Horror and, even more so, H.G. Lewis' gorefests, it helped usher in the splatter film. It remains my fifth fav film ever and Romero's best movie, at least IMHO.

- one of the greatest sequels ever made, and my second most viewed film ever, DOTD blew me away with it's amazing gore content and the great acting. The gory squibs made me think, yep that's what it most look like when someone gets shot, well minus the bright red color, of course. It remains Romero's second best film to date.

- My absolute fav film ever. This movie had me blabbering non-stop to my family and friends about it. I was just blown away. the gore, the humor, the characters, the acting, the babe that is Barbara Crampton. I developed a major crush on her, and THE classic scene with her and Dr. Hill's head, as well as her full frontal nudity, left a long lasting impression on my pre-teen mind. It is also one of those films that made me wanna make movies, myself.

- The definitive mix of action, sci-fi, and horror this film never, ever fails to get my adrenaline going. My jaw dropped, and still does, watching this film. Behold the beauty of the Alien Queen! Plus, the movie has a lot of heart, and that makes it even more memorable. A masterpiece in every way shape and form, this is my second fav film, ever!
- while I had already seen Argento's Creepers (aka Phenomena) and Inferno, nothing could prepare me for this masterpiece. This is one of the films that made me wanna make movies, stylistically it remains my biggest influence. The use of color, the amazing score, and the gore grabbed a hold of me. The first murder still impresses and blows me away to this very day.

- I will never forget staying up late to catch this on cable. The mix of humor and wild gore, to this very day is perfection. This one's style also influenced me a lot. I wanted to make stuff like this! Regardless of one might think of Sam Raimi today, this remains his best, arguably.

- The second greatest action film ever (the greatest is John Woo's very own Hard Boiled) the level of violence (ridiculous body count and ultra-gory squibs) had me drooling. it blew all of those whimpy Hollywood action films straight to hell. Basically, a wet-dream cum true for Sam Peckinpah, it is yet another HUGE influence on me. If I made an action film, it would surely be like this.

- perhaps one of the greatest movie going experiences I have ever had. The FX, the story, and the action blew me away then, and still do. One of those rare better than the awesome original sequels, which is another reason it impacted me.

Ashley Alexandra Dupre

OK, so Eliot Spizter is a jackass. He is a married man with kids and he goes and sleeps with a prostitute. On top of that, he used to shutdown whore-house, this makes him a hypocrite, and I fucking HATE hypocrites!

But, this is turning political and politics bore me, so let’s cut right to the chase, the call-girl in question here is hot: Ashley Alexandra Dupre.

A teen runaway, Ms. Dupre is gonna make a killing thanks to this whole ordeal. She is a musician on the side. Now, I could give a fuck about her music. It is not my cup of blood. I like things decidedly heavier and darker, but whatever. I can say this. She is hotter and more interesting than Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, etc. So, that’s good, right? She bound to get lot of new friends at her myspace .

Penthouse and Hustler both made her an offer to pose nude . Now Penthouse is not the mag some of you may remember it to be. It is really become Playboy but with slightly naughtier pics. But, I have a soft side for Penthouse, maybe it is cause it think Playboy mag blows. Whatever. But, personally, I hope Hustler gets the layout. Larry Flynt’s magazine is the single best porn mag on God’s green Earth, and it would be great if they gave us a shot of Ms. Dupre’s pink!

Our naughty beauty has a sexy skin tone and smoking body. I ain’t sure she is worth the $4,300 she charges, but hey maybe one of you reading this knows something I don’t. Anywho, she might be an inspiration to call-girls everywhere! Everyone needs a hero, right?

The AGONIST & Alissa White-Gluz

I recently got into Canadian metalcore band, The Agonist thanx to their awesome video for Buisness Suits and Combat Boots:









I, then, got their CD Once Only Imagined, and I was instantly sold as a fan. They sound sort of like In This Moment with a hint of Arch Enemy. While, thier music is definitely heavy, it has moments of melodicism that really hit the mark. The breakdowns are constant and mosh worthy, though some more lead guitar breaks would be nice. Of course, much of the attention to the band will be, and is, for their lovely signer and songwriter, Alissa White-Gluz.
She has an awesome scream but also a rather beautiful signing vioce. She made it on one of Revlover mag's Hottest Babes in Metal issues and rightfully so. I mean look at her. She has blue hair, pale white skin, stunning, beautiful green eyes, a hot body, and plays and loves metal music. Sure she is straight-edge, but hey, someone has to take care of your drunk ass. right?

Based on interviews I have read with her she comes off as smart and knowledgeable. Her lyrics for the band are further proof of this and another reason why I am practically in love with her.



So get their album, listen to the band, and fall in love with Ms. White-Gluz. Although, after this blog you probably already are!

Maria Brink


Tattoos, blond, busty, beautiful, plays and loves metal. Maria Brink, lead signer of metalcore group In This Moment, is indicative of what my ideal type of girl. She is a fellow NYer, albeit from upstate NY, and has a true love for metal. I LOVE sleeves (for those not in the know that would be an arm covered in tats), and hers looks amazingly hot.

She has a great voice, being able to sign with passion, power, and emotion, and a killer scream fucking scream, as well. Her band In This Moment, caught buzz on their myspace and eventually led Century Media to give them a contract.


Their debut Beautiful Tragedy was one of last year’s best releases. Heavy and melodic, the album makes me, at different times, wanna mosh, and at other times, touches my feelings. Few bands can accomplish this.


Ms. Brink is actually a mom, making her a metal MILF! Last night I saw her band
cover Pantera’s Five Minutes Alone on Fuses’s Talking Metal. They were fucking great, and I was reminded why I love this woman!

Hot Asian Girl of the Month- LILY THAI


This is to be my first (official) Hot Asian Girl of the Month. Now, I already had a blog about the lovely Maggie Q, last month, so one could say that she, by default, is actually the first one. But whatever the case maybe, I am gonna start this monthly feature with one of my personal favs: porn star Lily Thai.

Lily Thai was born on November 7. 1981 (that would make her 26, by the way) in Honolulu, Hawaii but grew up in Texas. She is of Filipino and Italian heritage (HOT mix right, there kiddies!). One of my fav clips I ever saw of her is one I found of a CUM FIESTA online, where she says something to the effect of “I call myself Lily Thai because Lily Filipino would sound pretty stupid”.

She has been in over a hundred porno films. They include genres like teen, Asian, and Latina. But, she is most well known for her ability to squirt.

A naturally lovely beauty is smoldering hot in her scenes, as well as coming off as likable and playful. There is a great lesbian scene with her and, fellow Asian goddess, Loni, but I saw it in a compilation, so I can’t tell you what the actual movie is called. But goddamn is it ever hot! Also, worthy of seeing is her hot boy-girl scene in ASSTASTIC ASIANS 3. Truth be told, any Lily Thai scene is a good, fucking scene!

Her myspace, by the way, is at http://www.myspace.com/lilythai

 
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